


A Better Way

by ArgylePirateWD



Category: Original Work
Genre: (all in the past), Eggpreg, Humor, Other, Oviposition, Technology, Tentacle Monsters, Tentacles, Trick or Treat: Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-06 04:01:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21220235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArgylePirateWD/pseuds/ArgylePirateWD
Summary: No one was reading the papers anymore.





	A Better Way

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ba_lailah](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ba_lailah/gifts).

> _Like, does the monster looking for an egg host take out a Craigslist ad,_ you asked? Well, not exactly. Give her a few decades.

Bl'sssha was an old school sort of ancient entity. She went to the papers for this sort of thing. Paid a few bucks to someone who looked at her like their understanding of the world was caving in on itself as she passed over the cash with her tentacle, and her message got put out there. Classified ads. She liked classified ads. She found herself plenty of willing hosts through the classified ads.

The damn internet was the trouble. No one was reading the papers anymore. Not even the old school hardcore monsterfuckers whose greatest joy in life was being filled to the limit with her broods. They weren't looking for her ads, either.

That or they'd found someone else. Thirteen springs in a row, like clockwork, Todd answered her ads. He took everything Bl'sssha threw at him, let her fill his belly with more eggs than anyone else could take. Then he got married. Met himself a shifter on that Bookface site, or whatever it was called.

"If you were the marrying kind..." he'd said. Then, more amused than terrified by Bl'sssha's earth-shaking, eldritch wrath, he handed her a phone. "Look, why don't you try Facebook or Craigslist or something. See if you can't find someone there, too."

She stared in disbelief at the contraption with her many fathomless eyes.

"It won't bite," Todd said, thrusting the phone out again. "Come on..."

But she was a creature of habit, and slick, slimy tentacles didn't work so well with sleek touchscreens. Bl'sssha snatched the phone from his hand and devoured it instead. She did the same thing when his laptop died in a shower of sputtering sparks beneath her tapping touch. The PC was a bit harder to get down, and didn't sit well in a gut full of eggs that were ready to be laid, but she devoured that, too.

"Well, those weren't expensive at all," Todd grumbled.

Bl'sssha huffed, and undulated out of his apartment.

Technology sucked. There had to be a better way to find a willing host. Maybe she'd pin a few flyers to some bulletin boards or telephone poles or something.


End file.
